CHAPTER ONE- PERMANENT

"You were gone all night, Julia." Jay complained to her as soon as she got in the house.

Chess had told her, believe the lie you can't talk about. "I can't talk about it." She had said simply and crossed her fingers that would suffice. At first it did. She dropped her bag, Jay took her clothes off and brought her to bed. She had hoped for a shower before getting into bed with him, but it hadn't worked out that way.

"Oh, these are pretty." Jay mentioned, snapping the white panties against her flesh as Chess had the night before.

"I thought so." Julia agreed as he laid her down. She attempted to take them off, but he stopped her.

"No, leave them on."

Oh, God...she thought as Jay took his time with her. She sensed he already knew, but he kept it to himself if he did.

"Jay, I have stuff to do."

"We have time." He told her. He kissed her to keep her quiet. She relaxed and gave in to him, thinking she still could still smell Chess's scent on her.

Over the course of a couple weeks, Jay still had questions. She insisted she couldn't talk about it, going as far as blaming him for his part he played in the lab. All he needed to know was she was ok and getting better. "I know because I take care of you." He countered. She had no good excuse for her overnight and having brought no clarity to it for Jayson only had him questioning her more. She didn't keep things from him. He could be trusted and the more he told her he could be trusted, she felt the less he trusted her.

Julia also spent her nights trying to return Jody home. Initially, Jody sought her in her sleep, calling to her like Jay had told him, then she would seek his energy in the darkness and they'd travel together. Julia had started to sleep in slippers and a hoodie when she went to bed as she never knew when Jody would call her. They'd zip line through time to the New Jersey suburbs. Each trip to Jersey was similar to the first. They employed several approaches to their night trips into the future. They would walk the long road back to base and never make it there. They never came in contact with another living soul. They never came in contact with the dead. The entire gray and battered landscape never changed and their time there was a waste. Jody speculated she had died. Julia admitted traveling led to a dead end, but she also thought of numerous reasons for that. 

Jody grew more comfortable in Maverick. He started seeing a couple different girls. His days were routine, safe and he had plenty to do to keep active. What the future held for him was a mystery however as the past was uncharted territory.

As the days and nights passed he and Julia, through their endeavors, grew more and more close, getting to know each other, talking about their pasts and their families and their views on the current world and everything in it as well as the future plans for the Mastro campus. As Julia recovered further from the infection, regaining some of her strength and her vitality, she had a routine to her day that made sense and she continued her usual monotonous days of being a housewife, as Tavin called her.

They'd moved Karen out and into Cal's one bedroom near the bar. She'd been gravitating that direction since rekindling her romance with him. They made up for lost time, kicked around the idea of making their relationship more permanent and she moved out entirely at the end of April. There was one bedroom now free. Tavin and Kelly intended on making it the baby's room and Julia decided to put Jody in that room until the time came that he couldn't be in there anymore. Once they got closer to that date in July when Kelly would have Tarin, then they'd make some more decisions regarding their future and Jody's. Tavin agreed temporarily with her, but he and Kelly would need that space eventually. "You know how I feel about family, Tavin Keller, and if we should all reside under one roof then so be it."

"Jules, it's my roof." He counter argued. "He's my kid." He added. "You also need to think about where you're putting your own kid."

"It will all work out. We have made this work before."

Jayson understood what she meant when she said they'd made it all work out before. Jay had to privately remind her this wasn't the farm house, they weren't surrounded by the living dead and there was no fence. She reminded him, "For now, Jayson. Yeah. For now."

The idea of Kelly having Tarin and Julia having Caroline in addition to Jody's unending presence planted the idea in his head that maybe they should find their own place to live. Julia found that humorous as she had no job and how would they live his modestsalary alone? Even though she had some money, that money would run out. Jay dropped the discussion temporarily, but the idea was still in his head. A place of their own. A small place, nothing large or too expensive. Obviously she wouldn't have to put all her money into it or she could if she chose to. He had a little money saved, but nothing like the amount she had in her account. He'd peeked at a statement that had come in the mail before she switched to online banking. He questioned her about the original purpose for the money she'd brought home from Philly. She'd intended on using that money to give her and Chess a fresh start when they were ready to settle down. Jay argued her plans changed when she and Chess split up. Julia realized Jay had a point. The whole idea of making this permanent made her nervous. Julia hated change, hated splitting the family apart.

"Oh, we're not splitting it apart, we're making room and making it bigger." Jay sighed.

"You know we aren't making it bigger. They are, Jay." She frowned. "The only way we've made it bigger is Jody."

"Why you gotta be so negative, Julia?"

"Negative or realistic, Jayson."

They both sat on line one evening on the sofa and surfed the net looking for a more permanent dwelling, a place they could call their own-or her own. Jay didn't care either way. He had talked to Tavin already. He agreed it was a good idea, a place of their own might not be a bad idea.  Jay dropped hints, but Tavin preferred a more direct approach. He advised him to bring up the subject and be honest. He volunteered to talk to her about it, but Jay was nervous. He didn't want her angry. He didn't want her hurt or upset. Jay warned him, "She's gonna flip out."

"No, she won't. She'll understand."

Jay thought back on the conversation with Tavin. Thought back to the myriad of reactions she could have and he decided to jump in head first and be honest like Tavin said. He laid it out for her in clear words and didn't drop hints.

As they looked at the Century 21 website they found a trailer park 15 minutes from the house called Maverick Commons. They'd put a pretty name on a trailer park community. The area looked clean and looked livable. As a community it came complete with a rec center, a pool, a park and a gym. All the perks were included in the community fees. Once they owned or partially owned that trailer, they'd pay a community fee that totaled 500$ a month. They'd pay on the trailer what was left over after she dumped her money, all or part of it, into the place. It had a fence around it. It had an open entrance. They looked at the few that were in their price range and they chose the cheapest.

2 entrances, one front, which opened into a fairly spacious living room with a fire place. The second entrance opened off a deck via sliding doors to the kitchen. Fairly updated with appliances and enough room for a table. She liked the counter space, which was more than what she worked with already in Tavin's small kitchen. Three bedrooms and 1 1/2 bathrooms. The first bedroom led to the second larger and then the bathroom next to it. A typical bathroom, which also had a closet with accordion doors that opened to the washer and dryer. Lastly the master bedroom, the largest of the three rooms, which also had the half bathroom. It was clean and it was cheap. Julia added up in her brain the cost of this trailer palace per month depending on how much they put down on it. It was feasible and if they took Jody with them, who would help with bills, then it was doable on their own. She also considered the idea of assistance. She thought that she and Jay would qualify for some form of assistance being low income. She also considered getting Jayson back in school. "Ok, then. This one is fine." She replied, pointing at the screen. She sent off an email to the realtor.

"You're alright then?"

"Yes. I understand."

"Jules, you're mad."

 Julia closed the lap top and stood up from the sofa.

"Julia, are you gonna flip out?"

"Never. Me? Why would I flip out? I mean, I find all of this very amusing. When I was sick, it took a crew to accomplish all the shit that I do. Didn't it? Jay, you were here."

"Um, yeah, but we managed."

"Yes, you all managed."

"You are angry."

"Never. No, not me." She replied, placing the laptop on the counter. "Whatever happens, Jayson, I will be alright. I will always be alright."

"We." He reminded her. "Us."

"This was your idea, so if you'd like permanent, then we'll do permanent. You want a commitment to more than a basement, my Jayson, then we will do that." She paused, looking at his face. His nervous eyes. She hated Jayson's anxieties. "Jayson, is this what you would like? You'd like to live with me and have babies with me and do the couple thing? Permanently?"

"Jules, I thought that's what we already were doing."

"Nothing has changed since before Christmas, except for the sex, Jay."

"What?" He asked, confused by her statement.

"I think that came out wrong." She replied. "Like everything I say or do comes out wrong."

She walked away from him, leaving him on the sofa and she head to their room. He followed her out of habit and once he gathered their wash from the dryer, he dropped downstairs and started folding while she wrote in her book.

"Hey, Jules. Where'd this come from?" He held up the nighty that Chess had bought her.

"Amazon." Julia answered, looking back to her book.

"I've never seen you in it." He said, tossing it at her. The light material covered her book and she thought back to her night with Chess. He'd taken it off her, touched her, had her touching herself..."When did you get it?" He asked.

"A couple weeks ago." She replied, pulling it off her book and laying it on her pillow. It had been in her bag for over a week and she'd worn it on her first night trip back to New Jersey with Jody. It got a little dirty in that house in the burbs. The panties she'd worn home from the hotel. Dammit, Julia groaned internally. She had given herself away. She tossed around the idea of telling him the truth since she sensed that was the direction they were going. Jay was taking her there.

Jay took her phone and started going through it, but she felt safe there was nothing on that phone that would give anything away. She had no communication on that phone with Chess or anyone else. There was nothing there that she couldn't explain. He tossed the phone to her. "There's amazon. Show me where you ordered it, cause I don't see it and I went back a while in that order history of yours. The last thing you ordered was for Alex's birthday."

Oh, he's stepping up his game isn't he? "I don't know why it's not there, Jayson."

"It's not there because you're lying." He accused her.

She didn't argue or try to defend herself or accuse him of being paranoid. She left it drop. She'd been caught. Jay was angry and he said nothing more, he kept to himself.

Julia woke to the alarm and turned it off. She reset it for an hour later to get Tatia up for school. When the alarm sounded she went and woke Alex and Tatia and readied the girl for her day. Without all the extra, her morning passed a lot easier. She felt bad though not getting breakfast and lunch ready, getting coffee together and doing the other small stuff like cleaning up the bathroom, gathering up their laundry.

"Jules, no coffee?" Tavin asked.

"No, I don't drink it." She shrugged, rubbing her belly.

"Lunch?"

"You'll need to take care of it yourself or Kelly." She replied. She zipped up Tatia's jacket and sent them out the door. As she went to the couch to lay back down for the morning, her phone rang. The realtor suggested a 10am showing of the trailer and Julia agreed. She went to wake Jayson who got up to go along with her. Before they left, Jay checked her sugar, made her breakfast and she wrote a very long list of things that she did every single day of the week. She folded it and put her list in the backpack.

She and Jay walked a few blocks to Cal's and they rode the elevator to the third floor where they were invited inside Cal's apartment. "We're not staying. We want the car, dad." Julia said, holding her palm out to him. 

"We're gonna go look at a place together." Jay announced. Julia and he hadn't discussed keeping their plans private, but Jay put it out there for them.

"A place to live?" Cal asked. "Julia, I told you we could find a place-"

"I will not live with you two." Julia replied as he tossed the car keys to Jayson. She glanced at Karen as she peered at her through the bedroom doorway. "No offense, of course. I doubt you'd like to live with me."

"Hadn't thought about it, no." Karen replied.

"Before you two make decisions, let me know. You two don't know what you're doing."

"I think we'll manage, dad, and yeah, we'll let you know."

"I could tag along." He offered.

"No thanks." Julia smiled. "Later. I will want you to look at it."

"Don't sign anything." He warned them.

"We won't." Jay said. "Jules, maybe he should come with us?" 

Julia and Jay went back to the car and waited for Cal who dressed and explained to Karen where he was going. Julia looked angry. "Jayson, how on earth do you think I am explaining to my father where I got the money for this place?" Before he could reply, she continued, "Jayson, where did I get the money? He's gonna get into our finances and the amount I have to put down. How will I explain this to my father?"

"Julia, I'm sorry. I didn't think."

"God, Jay. How do I tell my dad I was a whore?" She whined, giving him a gentle shove.  

"Oh, God. Don't say that." He cautioned her. "Chess has a past too. Say it was Chess." He whispered. "Jules, really. As a dad I would rather hear my daughter was married to a drug dealer than hear that she's a whore."

She's a whore, Julia's stomach flip flopped with his use of the present tense. She felt horrible bringing Chess's name into this. She quieted down as her dad took the keys off Jayson.

They drove the short ride to Mav Commons and met with the realtor who was on time and waiting for them. The trailer looked very much like the pictures on the website. Cal liked the place too. "It's a great starter for a young couple." The realtor announced. Cal took the realtor and started his own conversation. He'd bought and sold homes before and he felt comfortable quizzing the realtor. Having Cal along was an asset as Jay had believed. While he and Cal talked prices and square footage and talked about money, Julia and Jay took a walk around without their interference.

"What do you think, Julia?"

"I think it's alright, Jay." She said, looking through the sliding glass door over the yard. A shed. She looked past the yard to the fencing that surrounded the place. She looked past that to the fields adjacent to Mav Commons. She had her mind churning with thoughts. "It's not home." She said under her breath. He stood behind her, placed his hands on her shoulders.

"Jules, babe. I think it's alright too." He gave her a gentle squeeze and kissed the top of her head.

"You kids ready to head home?" Cal asked.

"Yeah. We are." Jay answered.

Cal had a handful of questions regarding their email that they'd sent to the realtor. Julia sat uncomfortable in the passenger seat as Cal got to the million dollar question. Where did they get money for a down payment? Julia looked over the seat to Jayson, then back to her dad. "Um, I can't talk about that with you." She replied quietly. 

Cal left the subject drop as he drove them home. He liked the place. He'd even set up an appointment for himself and Karen to look at a similar one later that week. He had to go online and look at the ones that were available. He thought they found a great and cheap way to live. The rent was cheaper than the rent he paid for their apartment. Julia and Jayson stood at the curb and watched as Cal drove away.

"Jayson." Julia groaned. "Neighbors, Jay."

"I'm sorry, Julia. We love your dad though, Julia, and if anything ever happened that you needed someone, he'd be right there."

"Your mother, though, Jayson." She stomped off toward the house.

She entered the house and slammed the door. Jay pulled out his cell phone and texted his brother. -She is pissed. 

-I'll talk to her. He texted back.

She pulled the door open and stepped through the screen door onto the porch. "I'm sorry, Jay."

"Yeah, Jules, it's ok." He waved at her.

"No, it's not. Jay, I'm sorry."

"Julia, I said it's alright."

"I never lived with anyone before." She said, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Yes. You have."

"Not like officially, so don't be mad at me."

"What are you so scared about?"

"I don't like change, Jayson. I feel like I'm gonna jump outta my skin." She turned and went back in the house without the door slamming this time.

"Well, here we go." Jay muttered to himself. He placed the cell back in his pocket and when it buzzed he pulled it back out and read the text from Chess, reminding him of the doctor's appointment in the morning. Have her ready, he said, the earlier the better.

The earlier the better...she was usually up first. He texted ok and left it at that. He head inside and reminded her the earlier the better in the morning.

"You two taking the whole night again?" Jay asked as she sat at the counter, searching over the area of Mav Commons.

"I can't talk about that." She replied, dismissing his comment. "You know I can't talk about that."

Jay leaned into her. "Julia, you don't want to talk about that." He told her before he went downstairs to change into his gym clothes.

Next she faced Jody who arrived to the counter with her. He was waiting for Jay to go to the gym.

"Morning." He said. "Oh, you're in a mood." He observed.

"I am." She nodded, tugging on her hair and twisting it between her fingers. Her legs were jumpy, her hands trembled.

"Julia, is your sugar ok?"

"Not my sugar." She sighed, shifting in her chair.

She started rambling sentences off at him. Her morning, her trip with her dad and Jay to Mav Commons. Her whole day was good, but her whole day was shit, as she called it. She suddenly changed moods and quieted down, apologized for freaking out on him, letting him hear all her thoughts and her worries.

"Julia, are you feeling alright?"

"I am, yes." She nodded. "I'm sorry about all that."

"We all have days like that, right?" He asked, sensing she was off. "Hey, want me to stay home? Maybe we could do something to take your mind off-"

"What could we possibly do, Mayers?" She asked. She closed the lap top and leaned over the counter. "Are you flirting with me?"

"No. Julia." He shook his head and leaned back in the seat away from her. "I'm not, no." He replied.

"What did you have in mind then?"

"Not what you're thinking."

"I'm not thinking that, but you said do something to take my mind off-" She put her hands over her face and hid from him. "That was so inappropriate, Jody. It's my fault." She sighed, folding her arms and resting her head on them. "I swear it sounded like-and I was like-shit, Jody."

"What is wrong with you?" He asked.

"Nothing. Everything." She cried. She felt the tears escaping her eyes before she could control it or stop it. He placed a hand on her shoulder and she jumped, pulling away from him. 

He put his hands up and stepped away from her. "Julia, whatever is going on, it can't be this bad. Just calm down and take a deep breath." He suggested. 

"I'm sorry, Jody." She cried. "I can't help it."

Jayson came upstairs and found her crying. He chose to ignore it and leave altogether with Jody. "Hey, we can't help this." He said, walking down the driveway.

"We can't do anything?" Jody asked, following him, looking back over his shoulder at the house.

"Nope, not a fucking thing."

"She gonna hurt herself or anything?"

"Nah, she won't. This is only the beginning."

"This gets worse."

"Oh, sure. She'll drive us nuts."

"What do we do?"

"Watch and wait. I'll take care of her when it's time." Jay said. "I always do."

Chess arrived early in the morning to a dark house. He left himself in through the kitchen door and flipped on the light switch. He heard footsteps upstairs and figured Tavin was up for work, then on his way to the steps he found Julia on the sofa curled up beneath a throw blanket. She was awake and she hadn't budged when he came through the door, which surprised him.

"Hey, Julia." He said, standing above her. "What are you doing? Are you gonna get ready?"

"I'm not going. Leave me alone." She answered him.

"You can and you will." He said, heading to the kitchen. He opened the fridge and poured himself some juice. He made some coffee as she sat up and got off the couch. "Go get dressed, Julia." He said as Tavin came downstairs. He watched as Julia descended the steps into the basement.

"She hasn't moved. All she does is cry." Tavin told him.

"She eating?"

"Yes. Sugars are good. She does do that."

"What's going on with her?" Chess asked.

Tavin took a few minutes and explained the last month with Jody, the talk about them moving out and finding a place of their own.

"You mean to tell me that you're throwing her-them-out? Then they went and looked at a place and took Cal with them and he is asking questions about where she got money."

"Well, yeah." Tavin replied. "Eventually, Chess, she's gonna have to come to terms with Philly. She is gradually doing that. She told Jay yesterday she was a whore."

"Fuck."

"Good luck with her today. I don't know what kinda shape she's gonna be in."

"I'll take care of her." He said, filling up Tavin's thermos with coffee. He sat it on the table next to him. Then he filled his own travel mug with coffee. "Julia, it does not take all day to get dressed." Chess said sternly.

She climbed the stairs, thinking soon she wouldn't have to climb stairs anymore. She stood looking tired and drawn in front of them. Her face still red and wet from crying. "Talk with the doc, Julia." Tavin said.

"Yeah, Tav. Go fuck yourself."

"Jules." Chess snapped.

"Chess, it's ok." He said, filling his cereal bowl.

"It's not ok. Julia, you know better."

"Fuck you, too, Chess. Are we leaving or what?" Julia walked away from them leaving the house through the front door.

"I hate it when she gets like this." Tavin said, sitting with his cereal.

"I hate this shit too." Chess agreed. "It's been awhile."

"Last summer, Chess." Tavin reminded him. "Hey, deal with her. It's your turn."

At that moment the door opened and she popped back inside. "I'm sorry, Tavin." She yelled. "Chess, let's go." She turned and let the door close behind her.

"It's alright, Red. Have a good day." Tavin pointed at the counter. "Grab her monitor and her bag, Chess." Tavin ordered. "She still needs to do that. Grab some breakfast, too."

Chess met her at the car where she got inside all by herself, closing the door before he could even try to do it for her. He'd grown used to the drill of opening and closing doors for her. He hadn't seen or talked to her in a month.  She hadn't called him and he hadn't called her. He let her make her commitment like she wanted to. He kept quiet as he drove away. He didn't mention her appearance or her state of mind, he left her be till he reached McDonald's and he parked the car. He took her bag and her inside and he took her into the bathroom where her locked them inside. He sat her down and he took her sugar for her. He crouched in front of her. "Insulin, Julia. How much and which one?" He asked.

"I need 20 of the purple and white bottle. I need 10 of the red and white bottle." She answered as he opened the first syringe. "Two needles and two sticks." She said, letting her tears fall again.

"You're having one of those days, Julia." He observed, poking her left arm with the first syringe. He capped it and he put it in the bag. He opened a different syringe and he drew up the other insulin, then moved to her opposite arm and injected her with that second dose.

"Weeks, Chess. One of those weeks." She corrected him. "Or months." She added, trying to laugh through it all. She stood up and she pulled her pants down, then sat back on the toilet to pee. "What?" She asked, looking up at him. "I didn't go before I left the house. I have to pee."

"Ok, babe. Ok."

"Jayson knows." She said, wiping herself, then pulling up her pants.

"Ok. Knows what? You told-"

"I didn't tell. No."

"He's mad?"

"Yes. He found my nighty you got me. He thinks...God, I don't know what he thinks."

"Well, what did you say when he found it?"

"I got it off amazon. He put two and two together and all I can say is I can't talk about it. Like it has to do with McGill or something, but it doesn't. He knows." She paused, looking at him looking guilty across the bathroom. "When I was leaving, he asked if I wanted to take it with me."

"Did you bring it, Julia?" He asked.

"Of course not." She snapped at him. "I am not a good liar, Chess. I feel like shit, then Tavin with all his shit. He told us to leave, but he's being nice about it. Kelly is bitching at him how there's always people around. How are they supposed to be a family while there's a million people walking the house. She wants him to herself and I make her uncomfortable."

"Where you going, babe?"

"We found a place. It's livable. I can show it to you on my phone. I saved it." She said as she washed her hands. "Then we go to look at the place and we take my dad of all people. I wanted Tav to like co-sign with us cause the money came from Philly. So how am I suddenly supposed to explain how I came up with half the money or whatever amount I am putting down on this place to my father? So I say to Jay, cause he already thinks I am a total whore, how am I supposed to tell my dad I was a whore?"

"What did he say?" Chess asked as they left the bathroom together.

"He said blame you. You're the fucking dealer, Chess. But I don't feel comfortable blaming you for anything so I told my dad I can't talk about that with him."

"Tell your dad whatever you think is right. I don't care."

"All this talk about money and how I earned it is a pain in my ass."

"We both did things we're not proud of." He said as they stood at the counter. Julia ordered food for them, their usual breakfast. They'd eaten the same breakfast for years at McDonald's.

"Felonies and sex." Julia moaned, swiping her debit card.

"You got enough money, babe? I could-"

"I don't want any of your money."

He took they tray as the girl finished setting their stuff on it. They sat at a booth and she sat across from him.

"I don't like hiding anything, lying. You know how I am, Chess."

"Well, what would you like to do? Cause problems?"

"Lying is causing problems. I'd rather be a whore than a liar."

"Why does all this bother you so much?" He asked.

"Because it does." She replied, opening her breakfast.

"Are you mad at them?"

"No." She answered. "I am not. I think they are mad at me."

"Tav seems concerned, not mad. I don't know about Jayson. He seems normal."

"Ugh, always normal. He doesn't talk to me and when he does it's like he's searching for an answer. I'm telling you, I have to come clean and deal with it."

"You are carrying his child, Julia."

"For how long?" She muttered. "That's another thing. I feel like it's all gonna end and it's gonna be a mess."

"So you wanna live with Mayers."

"I like Mayers. He's my friend. It's nice having a friend I don't sleep with." She admitted. He stared at her skeptically. "I would tell you if I had. The kid's not ugly or mean or anything. His energy isn't right. That's all."

"So if you two were the last living people on earth."

"Hypothetically, I would force myself, but that doesn't happen. Believe me."

"Well, you're already sounding better." He noticed.

"I needed to talk to someone. I can't talk to them about this. I'm glad you came for me."

"You could have called me."

"I couldn't call you. And say what?"

"Um, everything you just told me. I don't have the answers, but you could talk to me. You know that."

When Chess said she could talk to him, she did. She rattled off every thought she'd had for the last month on the ride to Dr McGill's office. She was rational and calm. No more nerves and tears and weaknesses. She needed to think out loud and bounce her thoughts off someone and he was the lucky one. Their appointment came off without a hitch. The physical, the questions, the answers, the routine lab work.

"We're fine. We're healthy. Does all this even matter, doc?"

"Yes." He answered. He looked over Julia's medical records from Maverick as well as her sugar journal and her insulin needs. He had nothing new to add, except that he would like the GYN to follow her at the appointments with him instead of at home. He had one available and he had her see the kind older female doctor whom he already briefed on her case and her progress. She had a full GYN exam and an ultrasound complete with a picture of the baby. "Baby Morgan is healthy and at 14 weeks gestation." Dr Quinn told her. "Your gestational diabetes is a concern, but with the current regimen you appear fine. I would like to increase the long acting insulin and increase the sliding scale coverage."

"I appreciate all you've done and it's cool that you want to be involved, but if her dad can't be involved, then I can't do all this here." Julia informed her. Dr Quinn looked to Chess then back to Julia. "Chess isn't her father. We're separated."

"Yes, since last summer." Chess added, squirming a little in his seat.

"Where is the father?"

"At home." Julia answered. "There was an incident in the lab. He's banned." Julia told her, looking to Chess for help explaining this situation.

"Banned, Mrs. Morgan?"

"You may not have clearance for such matters." Chess said, taking Julia's hand. "Jules, don't say anything else."

"Ok. Just talk with McGill maybe?" She suggested to Dr Quinn. "If you both can clear her dad to come along on these appointments and be involved in at least the gynecological stuff, then I am ok with this. Otherwise, I will continue to see my personal GYN in Maverick." Julia sat uncomfortably in her chair. "May I speak with Dr. McGill please?"

She and Chess waited until Dr McGill arrived into the office and she explained what she told Dr Quinn. He said he would look into clearing Jayson, but doubted it would be possible. "Julia, you are aware of the serious nature of his actions."

"I am aware, yes. But he did the very same thing you all thanked Chess for. Only difference is Zoe Flannigan wasn't loose in the lab and the others were. That's what I know."

"It is important that we follow you in regards to your child and throughout the childbirth. She could be born in the lab, Julia. It is a safe environment and the new lab will have a variety of-"

"That's the funniest thing I heard all year, doc." Julia rose from her seat. "If you think for one minute I am giving birth in your lab, then you're insane. Clear Jay and I'll think about it and that's a no on the lab. Absolutely not."

"Julia, there are documented cases of post infection births where the baby is born infected." He informed her. "I'm not 100% sure she will be, of course, but-"

Julia was speechless.

"Doc, really. Must you scare her to death?"

"It's imperative she is followed by our professionals and possibly undergo quaran-"

"Your own doctor just told us she was healthy."

"Wait, Julia." He said, catching her as she went to leave the office. "So, doc, what you're saying is there is a possibility that her baby could be born with the virus." Chess was serious and calm.

"It is a community health risk, yes. In our facility she has a greater chance of survival."

"It is an infant, my daughter." Julia said, noticing Chess wasn't taking his hand off her. "She's not a health risk to anyone." Julia was offended and boiling beneath her skin.

"Jayson must be cleared for this." Chess told him. "He has every right as a father. Listen, doc, there are ways we can keep him from knowing the location of anything. Please, explore these options and I am positive we can come to a reasonable solution."

"I will do all I can, Morgan." He assured him.

"There are other options opposed to carrying to term." Dr McGill mentioned.

Julia shook her head. "No. I won't do that. I planned her."

"Terminating the pregnancy is an option. If you'd spoken at length with Dr Quinn, she would have informed you of your options. She's a specialist, Julia."

"I have no more questions. I don't wanna hear another word." Julia was offended and angry and baffled by the news she'd received about her otherwise healthy daughter she carried. She turned from both of them and walked out of the office. She and Chess walked to the car. 

"Could you put an infant down?" She asked. "Chess, if it came down to it, could you-"

"Yes. If it came down to it, Julia." He answered. "Julia, he only said it was a possibility not a fact."

"Chess. Before they get their hands on her and do the labs and the tests and treat her like Zoe."

"Yes. I would, for any of you. Isn't that the deal?" He told her, taking hold of her. He put arms around her shoulders and pulled her close to him. "We'll deal with this, Julia. It's not written in stone. He only said a possibility."

"What am I gonna do, Chess?"

"Well, we can sit and talk and figure something out. We got time, Julia."

"Chess, I think I would like to see where you live. Where do you live anyway? You live on a base or do you-"

"Jules, usually we are transferred or assigned someplace, but our group is special so I got a place. We meet up like a job everyday and we do our usual."

"I don't wanna know, but where do you live? Is it a secret or something?"

"Not really, but it's-I got a place with Ben. It's just an apartment, not a great neighborhood. It's kind of a mess. Well, my half. You know how I am."

Chess closed her into the car and he set off on the ride to his apartment, which was not in the nicest neighborhood. She'd been to worse places and she didn't plan on moving in. She was interested in seeing where he lived. He'd been living elsewhere for nearly a year and she realized she didn't even know his address.

"Julia, my parents know where I live." He said as he climbed the stairs to the apartment. "Ray was here. People know where I live." He laughed. "It's not a secret."

"You never told me."

"You never asked. Were you gonna stop by?"

"I don't know. Maybe." She replied as they climbed. "How far, Chess?"

"Three floors, Julia."

He lived in an old building with no elevator. A cheap two bedroom, small and tidy in the common areas like the living room and the kitchen. The place was antique and had no modern amenities or updates. There were area rugs thrown over old hardwood floors that were as worn as the structure itself. 4 small rooms and two of them were bedrooms. There was a bathroom that was barely big enough to get one body inside.  "It's, uh, cute." The best compliment she could think of. The trailer she'd toured the day before was a palace compared to Chess's apartment. It was definitely a bachelor pad.

"It is what it is. Hungry? I think I got some leftovers. Or we could order something? I usually order something. I don't cook."

"Someone does." Julia noticed the pans and dishes that were clean in the rack. "Ben?"

"Yeah, Ben."

They ordered Chinese and while they waited, Julia peeked inside Chess's messy room. "You obviously don't entertain a lot in here." She gasped at the clothes and the empty bottles and the empty take out containers.

"I had one girl here."

"She ever come back?" Julia laughed. "Or is she still in here under all this shit?"

"She's still here." He answered, appearing next to her. 'You're the only girl I ever had here."

"You 12 or 20, honey? Want me to clean this mess up?" She asked, stepping inside.

"You don't have to, but since you're here."

Chess slipped into the kitchen and brought her back trash bags. He left her in there and said he'd order food. Julia started with clothes first, then trash, then the stuff that could be washed-dishes, silverware. She handed off the washable stuff to him, then continued her work. She'd bagged all the laundry by the time food arrived. He was impressed all she accomplished in an hour, but the size of the room was a plus. She could see the floor and the bed. They sat on the floor in front of the TV while they ate, watching Maury and talking. She chided him about the state of his room.

"Alright, mom. I know. But I'm lazy." He made excuses. "But I am also not here a lot and when I am here I don't sleep in there."

"So you sleep out here." She laughed.

"Not exactly." He replied, looking toward Ben's room.

"Where's Ben if you're in there?"

"Um, he's in there with me." Chess answered.

Julia nearly choked on her food when he answered her. Chess blushed like a kid, his cheeks reddening the color of her hair. He patted her back and she cleared her throat, coughing at the realization that Chess was...what was he doing?

"Did you do it, Chester Morgan?" She whispered.

"I don't wanna talk about it." He answered, spooning in a mouthful of food. "We do live together. He's gay, Julia. Seemed like a logical step to take."

"Logical?" She smiled. "So, did you like it?" She asked, looking sideways at him, hoping for a positive answer.

"Of course, yes." He replied remaining tight lipped on the details.

"Awe, babe. That's, um, good? You do it all the time or are you just keeping it simple or are you liking him? Can I meet him?"

"Julia." He stopped her. "I do like him. He's my friend. He was my friend first and one thing led to another." He saw her gawking at him. He felt uncomfortable. "Julia, I prefer pussy honestly."

"Ok, I prefer dick." She replied. "As long as you're happy, then that's all that matters." She leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Seriously, Chess." She stood up and returned to his room. He crawled to the doorway and ate his Chinese food while he watched her move fairly quickly around his room.

"I'm glad you're all bipolar, cause you're cleaning your ass off."

"I'm not all bipolar. I'm stressed."

"You looked it this morning. Hair everywhere, all crying, moody and freaking out."

"It's the situation with Jay."

"Keep your mouth shut." He advised her, pointing at her with his fork. "Deny, deny, deny."

"We aren't talking, because of me. We aren't fucking, because of me. He's all snippy and distant."

"What do you wanna do, Julia? I don't think that leaving him would do any good right now. If you do shit, then of course you're gonna feel guilty."

"Let me go, Chess."

"Fine, go. I'll let you go. Will that help?"

"Yes. Thank you."

"Doesn't feel any different, Julia."

"I know. Did you expect lightening to strike or something more wizard like, my king?"

"Well, queen...kind of."

Julia made small talk and finally broke into the privacy surrounding Ben and Chess. Once he was released from the lab he returned home to the apartment and suddenly Ben made more sense to him. Chess had never been anti-gay or homophobic in any sense of the word. Ben was open about his lifestyle, his social life, his involvement in the community. He'd go out and occasionally bring the same someone home. Ben's occasional displays of affection with this someone never bothered Chess like it would other roommates Ben had in the past. He and Ben bonded over zombies in boot camp and got assigned to this squad together. They got to know each other, liked each other enough and decided to move in together in the dirt cheap apartment. Chess considered him a brother. He had mentioned Ben several times since he went in the marines, but never mentioned since the release a couple months prior any intimacy. He'd kept a lid on it, Chess wanted it low key, didn't want boyfriend problems to add to the girlfriend problems and the wife problems. He said he didn't have feelings like he had for Macy or Julia, even. "It's different, Jules. I'm not falling for the guy or anything. It's not like that. But Ben, that's a different story altogether."

"Well, you're cute, smart, strong, loyal, responsible. I could see why anyone would like you, Chess. You're a good guy."

"Thanks, Julia, but I didn't want a boyfriend. I don't even want a girlfriend."

Julia sat on the end of his bed and looked down at him in the doorway with his Chinese food container in his hand. She never thought in a million years she'd be having this conversation with Chess.

"But he likes you?" Julia asked.

"Yes, I think so." He thought a moment. "I know so." He corrected himself.

"Like I like you?"

"Yes." He nodded. "Jules..." He started to pull back from her. She sensed he didn't wanna talk anymore.

"It's ok. Not like I haven't fallen for a girl, right?" She sounded reassuring, getting up and started bagging up trash. When she finished she held open the bag for his container. He sat quietly thinking whether he wanted to continue talking about Ben. "Jess alone, Chess." She said, tying the bag in a knot. She stepped past him and looked for a vacuum cleaner, retrieving it from the closet in the living room. She ordered him to find her some cleaning products, Windex or dust cleaner and a rag. Chess found Ben's cleaning kit. "Oh, he's an organized fella isn't he?" She smiled, taking a bin full of products off his hand.

"Jess was special, Julia."

"To me, yes. I still think about her." She admitted. "I miss her." She further admitted. "Macy was different. She was just hot, then it unfolded into madness and drugs, but Jess was different."

"I remember."

"You can have different at your own pace, Chess. It doesn't make you any less of a man or a marine or a brother. Remember that."

"Ok." He watched as she vacuumed the small carpeted room and then she dusted quickly. Months worth of dust had accumulated. He was a busy man more than a lazy one. Half the time he didn't come home and when he did he spent his time with Ben watching TV or in Ben's bed. "He wants us to go out." Chess said out of the blue.

"Go." Julia responded.

"No. I can't be exclusive to him. I can't do that. I don't want that."

"Then don't be exclusive. Chess, I am not the best person to hand out relationship advice."

"Eh, neither am I. You asked about Jay and-"

"I know what I am doing with Jay, thanks. I needed you to let me go to do it."

"Awe, Julia, you're fucking running. You're gonna fuck him over?"

"No." She replied. "I wouldn't call it that. He deserves better. He deserves so much more. I didn't want to move in with him to begin with. I warned him. I warned Tavin."

"Move in? The basement?"

"Yeah." She nodded. "I'm going to do what I do best.  I'll still see him and we have the baby and all. But I'm moving out. I should have moved out after I broke up with Tav."

"What did I have to do with all this? Letting you go?"

"It's complicated. I can control my own self. Not directed by you or anything. There are no boundaries."

"Awe, it was fun."

"It definitely was. It's good sex, Chess. We always have good sex."

"You want the ring, Julia?"

"Nope. I'll lose it if I don't wear it. You hold the ring."

"You could wear it."

"You got enough problems, Chess. You're only asking for more with me wearing that. It comes with responsibilities we aren't ready for." She looked at his pants, knowing it was in his pocket. "We married too young."

"Do not start with the regrets. You shoulda fucking waited for me. I wanted you to wait for me."

"It's over, Chess. I won't fight about it now."

"Or fight for it."

"Chess, you got a girl and a fiancée and a boyfr-sorry. I am not fighting for something you won't fight for yourself."

Julia pointed to the bags of laundry and identified them as such. She pointed at the trash bags and he stood and took them outside. When Chess was on his second trip out with the trash, she kicked off her shoes and laid on his bed. "Come here." She called, hearing footsteps in the apartment. When a tall and thin kid with strawberry blond hair stood in the doorway, she startled a bit. "Are you Ben?" She asked, sitting up straight on the bed.

"Are you Julia?" He asked, looking over the clean bedroom. He spied his cleaning products in the bin on top of Chess's dresser. Pretty blue eyes. He wore fatigues with his last name embroidered on the pocket like Chess's did.

"I am the cleaning lady." She smirked. He smiled. "We weren't doing anything." Julia told him, feeling like she was invading his territory.

He laughed. He had a nice smile, a friendly voice with a hint of a southern accent.

"So, you kill zombies."

"So have you from what I hear. Why didn't you join when he asked you to?"

"Uh, not my scene." She replied.

"I think it is. I have heard the stories." He looked at her jeans. "No knife. I guess the threat level is low."

"It's in my bag." She pointed to the living room.

Chess came back inside and closed the door behind him. He stepped into the doorway next to Ben and Ben's hand went for Chess's hand, which Chess allowed in front of her. "You met the wife, I see."

"I met the cleaning lady." Ben smiled. "She does nice work. This must have taken all day."

"She volunteered." Chess smirked looking up at him, emphasizing the word 'she'.

"As if I don't clean enough of this apartment, Chess." Ben criticized him, turning his body closer to Chess.

Shit, they are holding hands...Julia thought, staring at the two of them. She was used to seeing a strong and confident Chess with Damon, not the shy kid next to Ben. She suddenly felt like the third wheel in their friendship, fuckship, whatever they had going on between them. If she lived closer, she would have left at that moment as the situation was awkward for her, not them.

"See what I mean?" Chess asked, holding up Ben's hand in his.

Julia gasped a little surprised he'd made that comment.

"It's ok, Chess. It's sweet." Julia reassured him.

"You have the problem. Not anyone else, Chess." Ben told him, pulling his hand back down. He left go and put an arm around Chess's shoulders.

Fuck...Julia groaned...please, don't fight in front of me...

"You're bi, right?" Ben asked her.

"Uh, yes."

"She gets it, Ben." Chess told him, separating from him and walking into the living room.

"Can't exactly force it though." Julia added, feeling the vibes off Chess. "But I get it, yes." She said to Ben. "It takes time, you know." She smiled, hoping that helped a little.

The energy coming off the two was heavy, Chess's uncertainty and Ben's jealousy.

"Are you staying, Julia?"

"Oh, no. I have to go back home."

"She can stay if she wants." Chess said, appearing back in the doorway.

"Oh, Gosh, did I do something wrong? Am I like in the way here?"

"Jules, no. You're not." Chess answered.

"I don't want, no that's not right. I'm not trying to-this is really awkward for me cause you're just jealous and you think we were -"

"Julia." Chess rolled his eyes.

"I wasn't fucking him." Julia put it out there.

"Julia, I never said I had a problem with you being here."

"The energy coming off you is just heavy. I think you two need to talk. There, I said it."

"Energy?" Ben smiled.

"She's kind of sensitive to emotions and feelings is all. Once you're around her enough, you realize that." He looked at Julia. "He knows about us and he knows about the lab."

"So what we were doing in the lab. You told him things."

"So he would understand. I had to explain why I came home and-"

"Wanted to go to bed with me." Ben finished the sentence for him. "He-his decision was what I have been waiting for."

Julia slid off the bed and onto her feet. She picked up her shoes. Once she was out of Chess's bed, the energy around Ben changed, calmed. She squeezed past them into the living room, pulling the door shut to the room. She knew the fact she was in Ben's territory bothered him. Her presence alone was making him uneasy. Ben knew Chess preferred women. He felt like he was losing on his home turf.

"She's my girl, Ben." Chess announced as Julia tried to find a place she felt comfortable. "She'll always be my friend. I told you about-"

"Oh, Chess, stop it." Julia said under her breath. "Hey, why don't you take me home?"

"Yeah, Julia, I'll take you home."

Chess finally got the hint. She slipped her feet in her shoes. Julia's feet moved fast down the steps. Chess met her on the street by the car where she waited.

"Julia,  I told you."

"He's super jealous, but it's because he likes you a lot. You gotta sense that." She said once inside the car.

"I sense it."

"You two seriously need to chat. Open up with him, so he knows what to expect. I never felt so out of place in my life."

"I'll talk to him."

"Not about me, about you. You need to talk about you."

"Gotcha."

The drive was long in rush hour traffic, but once they crossed the state line into Pennsylvania they took the back roads home. Dr McGill called on the way through the countryside and said he didn't get any clearance for Jayson to return to any facility associated with the lab or physician's offices. She thanked him for his work and for following her and then said she wouldn't return at all. Chess made a face at her, like that wasn't going to go over well. She had never volunteered to be followed by the team of docs, Chess had. Alert and aware, she rescinded that willingness to participate any further. She disconnected the call and a few minutes later, the phone rang again. Dr McGill agreed to discontinue the pregnancy follow through, but asked if she would continue to be followed post infection by him personally. She said she'd think about it.

"Julia, you can't just opt out." Chess scolded her. Dr McGill had agreed with that sentiment. Options were no longer in the cards.

"Bullshit. I just won't go back."

"Julia, you agreed to it."

"I didn't agree to this." She sighed. "What is he gonna do?" Chess looked concerned as he focused on the road ahead of him. "Do you think Jay should be excluded from this? Would you be so willing to back out if it was you?"

"I agree with you, Julia. But it's not gonna go over easy."

"So I lost all rights? You got me into this."

"I thought you were gonna die, Julia. You didn't see you. You looked like death. Ask Jay." He sounded so insistent. "Julia, I thought you would agree to this. I thought you'd want to help with finding a cure. I didn't know it would evolve into all this."

"I understand, Chess. It's fine. Don't worry."

"I can do it."

"I know you can do it, but it's not your place to do it. It would be so much simpler if she was yours, but she's not."

He looked uncomfortable at this point.

"If the role was reversed, Chess."

"I know. But if it should come down to it, I'll be there for you, ok?"

"I know, thanks." 

Instead of going home, Julia had him drive her to her dad's apartment. They head up and found Cal and Karen having dinner before work. They had to leave in an hour. She and Chess made themselves comfortable at their dinner table and Karen served them spaghetti.

"Why are you two out running the streets together?" Karen asked as she watched Julia check her sugar and inject insulin. Julia felt the needles bothered her, but forgot her past till she was actually in the process of injecting.

"Doctor appointment." Chess answered.

"Together?" She asked.

"Yes." Cal replied for the two of them. Karen wasn't aware of any of their past, their problems, their infections, their ongoing situation with Dr McGill.

"Dad, there's some things I wanna talk about." Julia said, looking at Karen.

"Are we getting married again?" He asked sarcastically.

"Oh, no. But it has to do with it." Julia answered as Chess ate quietly. 

"Julia, what exactly are we going to talk about?" Chess asked, taking a drink of his soda. Julia looked nervous and scared. "Julia, are you sure this is a good idea?"

"I think so." She shrugged. "We need to talk about Philly."

"The city?" Cal asked.

"When we came home from the farmhouse, Chess and I kind of disappeared."

"Kind of? You two dropped off the map. You were in Philly."

"Yes." Julia answered. Julia skimmed the surface of drugs and drug dealing and the inability to adjust to returning home from the farmhouse. Chess sensed she was approaching the sex part of this conversation and he interrupted.

"I moved large quantities of cocaine and heroin. I sold for about a year and I made a fuck ton of cash. A lot of it we wasted getting wasted, but a lot of it, we saved thanks to her and that's where she got the money for this place she wants to move into. When we were together, I gave Tavin the down payment for his house then when we split up, what was left, I split it with her."

"What's that got to do with Philly?" Karen asked, not surprised by any of this.

"That's where the drugs came from." Chess replied. "When I went in the marines, Julia sold the gun and the rest of the drugs and we got out. That's all, right Julia?"

"That's all?" Cal asked, having stopped eating his dinner.

"Well, it is a lot of money and she figured you wanted to know where it came from. If you could please not tell my parents, I would appreciate it."

"Who else knew all this?"

"No one. Only us. I mean, Chess always sold weed."

"Yeah, I sold through middle school and high school. Philly was felonies."

"You made her an addict."

"No, I don't think so, Cal. Did I, Julia?"

"No, I made me an addict. We inhaled and smoked a mountain of coke. We drank a lot."

"So, can you get in touch with the realtor? She's gonna need some help with all of it." Chess said.

"You have the cash for this transaction."

"Yes."

"How are you paying the 500 a month community fee?"

"Um, well, I have to work out the kinks."

"Jayson." Karen answered for her.

Julia shifted in her seat. "Not exactly. I can take care of myself." Considering she was paying for the entire home, Jay and Jody could make up the rest and she would figure it out from there.

"I said that myself once." Karen said, looking at Cal. "My kids lead their own lives, Julia. I don't get involved."

"I know that. You've made that quite obvious."

"Think you would be a little more sympathetic considering you've done the same to all of them at one point or another. I got a feeling you're about to do it again."

"I have done nothing but take care of them for years. All of them. From the eldest to the youngest."

"And then some." She looked at Chess.

"And then some." Julia agreed.

"You don't care who you hurt. You plan on walking out on Jayson again?"

Julia felt her stomach flop. She glanced at Chess.  "Again?"

"You disappeared for weeks without Jayson. You were with him. Here you are again with him." Karen pointed at Chess.

"I was sick."

"You were released and you ran off with him."

"No, I didn't. I didn't run off with anyone."

"You don't understand the situation." Chess told her. "There's things you don't know."

"I see an immature and selfish child in front of me. I see an addict and a manipulator."

"It's not like that." Julia argued.

"Call it what you want. You need to grow up."

"Karen, stop." Cal said, interrupting their conversation. "There are things you don't know about, yes. But there are things that you need to do to get your head straight, Julia. You do need to grow up. You need to go on your medication, you need to go back into therapy and you need to go back to school. You do need to grow up and stop all this."

"Meds and therapy." Julia repeated. "Meetings too?" Julia suggested. "I could work the steps and get my life together." Julia smiled. " Sure, I can go back to school and I can make a perfect future."

Chess leaned back in his chair and waited. He saw Julia thinking and digesting what they had said to her. He gauged her reaction, figuring this could go a couple different directions. He suddenly realized they should have spoken to her dad alone and not with Karen present.

"Or-" Julia said slowly, looking around the small kitchen table at them all. "I could do things the way I have always done things. My way." Julia looked at her father. "It was a mistake involving you in anything. That was Jay's decision." She looked at Karen. "It was a mistake discussing personal matters in front of you. You checked out for 6 years and you have no clue what you're talking about."

"I see a person going down the same road I went, Julia." Karen told her.

"I have seen the similarities. But I busted my ass keeping your kids alive and fed and comfortable. Everything I have ever done has been to make their lives better. Everything I ever wanted was set aside for them, including my sanity and my self respect. The only mistake I made was going to bat for you. It was up to me, the decision to bring you into our home. Because, yes, it is our home." Julia stood up from her chair. "When the shit hits the fan, you two are officially on your own."

"Oh, hey, thanks for dinner." Chess said, taking the can of soda from the table. He followed Julia from the apartment to the car. "That was a great idea, boss. What else are we going to do this evening?"

"Oh, just take me home, Chess. I'm done fucking shit up for one day."

"Ok, my queen." He laughed, opening her car door. "Let's get you home."

"You'll probably be glad to get rid of me."

Julia walked in the house to Kelly at the kitchen table with her books, doing homework. Baby mama looked a little overwhelmed. Julia was surprised to see her sitting there instead of upstairs in her room with her books.

"Hey, Kell." Julia said as she started picking up the stuff off the living room floor. She set things back where they belonged and called Tatia downstairs to collect the toys she'd brought down. The laundry she tossed into the laundry room on the ever-growing pile of laundry. She noticed Tavin's uniforms were there unwashed. "What's up?" She asked, dropping her pack on the counter. She collected the dishes off the table and started putting the leftovers in containers, then placed them into the fridge. Next she ran hot soapy water and piled the dishes in the sink.

"Homework."

"What are you doing down here? You're usually up there."

"Waiting for you." She answered, looking up from her books.

Julia head into the laundry room while the sink was filling and she put Tavin's uniforms in the washing machine along with Jay's uniforms. Julia's strike was a bust. Kelly opted homework over housework. Kelly listened and watched as she started the washing machine. "His work uniforms need to be washed, dried and ironed and ready for him." Considering he paid the bills, the uniforms should be a priority. What exactly was Kelly waiting for?

"Iron? I don't know how to iron."

"I will show you." Julia told her, heading to the sink. "You have responsibilities to school and activities and all, but you're going to have to work around it." Julia washed the dishes and by the time she finished washing dishes she didn't eat off, the wash was done and she put his uniforms in the dryer first. "I was thinking that the kids aren't handicapped and you may be able to get them to do something other than sit around here on their asses. Tavin, though, you're going to have more trouble. He throws tantrums from time to time."

"There was someone here looking for you. Someone in a uniform."

"Oh, really. Dress uniform or fatigues?"

"Fancy, so I would say dress. He was looking for Chess too. Where ya been all day?"

"Chess's apartment. I cleaned his room and I met a friend of his, then I went to see my dad." Julia answered, pulling out the ironing board and iron from the laundry room. She reached for her pack and pulled out her cell. She called Chess and told him what Kelly said, a marine in dress uniform looking for them. All he replied was, 'I told you so'.

"What did the guy want, Julia? The one who came here-"

"I don't know. Did you ask? Get a card? Take a message?" She replied.

"No. He wasn't very talkative."

Julia started the next load of laundry. She jogged upstairs and had Tatia bathe then dry and get into pajamas. She checked in on Alex, but he wasn't home. "Tati, where's Alex?" She asked.

"Don't know." She replied, heading into her room.

She gathered up the laundry from the bathroom and head downstairs. "Kell, where's Alex?"

"Don't know."

"Was he here for dinner?"

"No." She replied.

"Did you call him?" Julia asked, reaching for her cell.

"No."

Julia dialed Alex's cell phone. When he didn't answer, she called again and then texted him. She'd left so early that morning she didn't see him before school. Julia checked the house phone that no one used and saw the messages and missed calls. She called the voicemail and heard the message from the middle school, Alex never showed up for school. She dialed Alex's cell again and demanded he answer the phone. Julia wasn't pleased. She started to get scared. She called Jayson.

"Where's Alexander?" She asked before he could say hello.

"His room I guess, Julia. I leave before he gets home from-"

"He didn't go to school, Jay. There's a message on the house phone. He's not answering his cell."

"Shit, then I don't know." He answered. "I'll try him."

Julia jogged upstairs and opened Tavin's door. He sat watching TV. "Where the hell is Alexander?"

Tavin didn't know, but saw her nerves were kicking in. She explained the school had called. She explained that he wasn't answering his phone. "Where is he, Tavin?" She asked again.

"I don't know, Julia. I'm sure he's alright. He's a kid, you know. He's probably with his friends. Maybe with a girl."

"What fucking girl?" Julia asked. He hadn't brought one home since Julia, too left the house. Julia went down the hall to his room. She looked for his iPad. She looked for his bag. If he left, he didn't take much. She dialed his phone again. "I don't care where you are, just let me know you're ok. Please, Alex. Before I call the police and report you missing. Please." She said nervously into his voicemail. She scrolled through the contacts on her phone. She stopped on Care's number. She tread the hall to Tavin. "You think he's with Care?"

"Delaware Care?" Tavin asked, seemingly unaffected that Alex wasn't home. "He'll come back, Julia."

"But, Tavin-"

"Julia, if he's with her, he's fine."

"This is not fine." She yelled. "This is not ok."

"I meant that he's not in trouble or hurt. That's what I meant."

Julia dialed Care's number and got the voicemail as well, then she texted her.

"Julia, calm down." Tavin said. "Don't freak out."

"He was home last night. When did he leave? I left before he did this morning. I didn't wake them up or get Tatia ready for school. Did you?"

"He's with a girl."

"Why isn't this bothering you? What-"

Her phone buzzed in her hand and she answered it. Jayson talked to Jody who said Alex left for school in the morning. "Jules, he's probably with a girl." Jay said. We'll deal with him when he comes home." Jay replied.

"Unacceptable." Julia hung up on him. She looked at Tavin. "You're the guardian." She informed him.

"The guardian is not worried yet." Tavin reached on the table next to him and got his phone. He texted Alex to call Julia before she had a panic attack. "Go wait, Red. He'll call."

"Why do you think this is ok?"

"I don't think it's ok and we'll deal with him when we can. What do you think we should do until then?"

"What if something happens to him? He's a kid. He could get hurt, die."

"You tell me if he's alive, Julia. Think about it." He sighed, putting his phone back on the table beside him. "Of course he's alive."

"Yes, of course he is." She agreed. "But I am still worried."

"What was up with the marine that came here looking for you two?"

"Not sure." She answered, turning and walking back to the kitchen. She set her phone on the counter and she went to iron the uniforms, which she made Kelly watch. The second and third she made Kelly do herself. As Julia watched over her, the cell rang and Alex told her he was ok and he was alive.

"Don't freak out, Julia." He said, his voice begging. "I'm ok."

"Ok? You're ok? Where are you?" She asked.

"I'm with Care."

"You need to bring your ass home, Alexander." Julia demanded.

"Julia, it's ok. It's not that big of a deal. I will."

"Put her mother on the phone." 

"She doesn't speak English."

"I have a translator." She waited for him to put Ana on the phone and she jogged upstairs to Tavin who got on the line with Ana. "Speak." Julia demanded. She listened as Tavin had a short conversation with Care's mom and then hung up. She didn't understand half of what was said, but she did hear the word birthday thrown around. Alex's birthday was over the weekend.

"Well?"

"Her daughter's in love." Tavin sighed.

"So? What's that mean?"

"It means he's allowed to stay overnight. That's what it means."

"Oh, my fucking God." Julia whined, taking her phone off him.

"He's fine. Go get him tomorrow morning. I'll have shorty pick me up for work. Jay can have the car."

"I'm gonna kill him, Tavin."

"This is no different than what we have done."

"I didn't go a state away to get laid, Tav."

"I rode like 4 hours, Julia. On a bus and more than a few times."

"Not the same thing."

"Why isn't it?"

"He's missing school."

"I missed school for that." He pointed at her. "You hooked them up."

"Me? This is my fault? He knows better. What's he thinking?"

"He's not thinking with his brain obviously." He looked past her into the hall. "What's she doing down there?"

"Homework, Tavin. Nothing else. Good luck with that one." Julia replied. "But your uniforms are done. Your dishes are done. Your kitchen is clean. Your living room is clean. I got your bathroom cleaned up too."

"Thanks, Julia. She's pregnant."

"So am I, Tavin. Hello..." She reminded him, rubbing her own belly. She pulled the picture from the ultrasound out and she crossed the room to him. She handed it over and he looked at Caroline. "I got into a disagreement with your mother tonight. I threw her and my dad out of the fortress."

"The fortress we don't live in yet?"

"Yep, that's the one." She laughed. "You know I don't like people telling me what to do. So...how's your credit?"

"It's shitty. How do you think it is?"

"Compared to having none at all?" She asked.

"I'll do what you want, Red."

"Yeah, tell me about it." She took her picture back and left him alone in his room. Kelly sat at the table with her books and Julia noticed she was reading the list she'd started for her while doing chores.

"This is a long list, Julia." She remarked, looking up at her.

"Yeah, once you get out of school, that will change. When you go back to school in the fall, it'll need to be changed again, but you'll figure it out."

"What does Tavin do, Julia? Does he have a list?"

"He keeps the roof over your head. And he'll pay for everything. That's what he does. It breaks even. He's your money. You'll do what he wants and when he wants it and you'll do it with a smile." Julia warned her. "Hey, at least he cuts the grass and shovels the snow."

"I'm not sure I like all this."

"Well, then, maybe you shouldn't have got pregnant and maybe you should have stayed at home where you belonged? How about that, Kelly? We aren't on the flipside anymore. Kinda sucks doesn't it?" Kelly stared at her. "No one said it would work out here. You didn't listen when we told you to wait. You didn't listen when we told you what would happen and you went and did it anyway. You knew he was fucking me. You know what he's like. What do you have left when it's not fun anymore?" She wasn't answering, had no idea what the answer should be. Julia pointed at the list. "This is what you have when it's not fun anymore and you have no options. Welcome to my world."

"Why do you do all this if you don't fuck with him anymore?"

"It keeps a roof over my head. You think I live for free? You think I like doing all this? You think it turns me on?" Julia asked. "Well, you will find out. Cause he does nothing, Kell. He has me doing all this. Now he has you. So...I will answer any questions you have. I will help you along if you don't understand something."

Julia threw the next load of laundry in the dryer and then dropped to her own bed and laid down. She felt bad for talking with Kelly so harshly, but a reality check was in order. Julia emailed the realtor again and then realized she forgot about her sugar and her insulin.

Fuck it...one night won't matter. She said to herself. She figured when Jay came home she'd do it then. He woke her up when he came in the house whether she wanted to wake or not. He would come downstairs and his feet on the steps would rouse her, then his changing clothes and maybe he'd play Xbox. She didn't sleep well in that basement anymore. She didn't sleep well since she returned from the future. She found herself thinking about Antonia, then Caroline. She had more questions than answers as the baby moved around inside her, the flutter of activity that she caused at night when she lay still and then when she lay with Jayson who was hypnotized by her movement and singing. Noisy creature, she was.

She awoke several hours later to a sharp pain in her right arm. She felt someone slapping her and she felt heavy. Gradually she came to, seeing Tavin at her side and Jay next to her on the bed. She felt the weight from Jay holding her down. As she became more alert, Jay told her to hold still. She felt wet, her entire body felt wet. She felt dizzy and nauseated.

"What are you two doing to me?" She asked, her voice distant to her own ears.

"Julia, where is your monitor?" Tavin asked.

"My what?" She was confused, sleepy.

"Juice, Jayson, go find some and mix sugar in it." Tavin ordered. "Your glucometer. It's not in the kitchen and it's not in your bag." Tavin said, loosening up his grip on her arm.

"I don't know. Dad's maybe?" She suggested. "I was there for dinner. What are you doing?" She asked, moving to see her arm.

"Pushing dextrose in your fucking vein, Jules." He answered flatly. "You were unconscious."

She sat up a little when she felt better, leaning on her pillows and looking at Kelly and Jody across the room. "I'm glad you brought that home." She said to Tavin.

"So am I." He agreed.

Jay brought her the juice with the sugar mixed in it. It was grossly sweet, but she drank it all and she pulled at her shirt. She was soaked. 

"How much insulin did you take today? Did you eat-"

"At dinner. I gave myself the insulin. The doc increased it this morning."

"Then what?"

"I forgot to do it before I came down here and I thought I would just do it when he came home." She answered. "I've done it before, Tavin. I didn't feel like going back upstairs."

"Julia, I won't even begin to tell you that regular monitoring is important."

"I know. I told you. I wait till he gets home sometimes."

"What would we do if you weren't here?" Jody asked.

"Call 911." Tavin answered. 

"It wouldn't happen at all if she just did what she was supposed to do." Jody remarked.

"Especially after adjusting the insulin dosage, Julia. You know that."

"I'm sorry. I know, but I didn't think, I mean I felt fine when I laid down. It was only a couple hours till he came home."

"It's five am." Tavin snapped. "You didn't wake up when he came home last night."

"I always wake up when he comes home." She looked at Jay. "You're noisy."

"You gotta get up and get something to eat and before you go get Alex, get that monitor from your dad."

"Ok." Julia nodded. "I'm sorry. Thank you." She said.

"Go get Alex?" Jay asked. "Where's he at?"

"With Care." Tavin replied, gathering up the trash from the kit he'd used. "I'll get us some more of this and bring home some start kits, Red. Can't have you dying on us."

Julia got out of bed and peeled off wet clothes. "I always wake up when you come down, Jay. Did you even come home last night?" She asked. "Where the fuck were you? You never-" Julia stopped herself. "Who were you with, Jayson?"

"Hayley. But it's not what you think. We were just hanging out."

"Did you sleep with Hayley?"

"Near Hayley, but not with Hayley. I don't mess with Hayley. I learned my lesson." He paused. "Julia, I wouldn't do anything with her. We're friends."

"Oh, wonderful." Julia said, pulling her robe around her. She felt gross. She still had the IV taped to her arm. She wondered if she should pull it.

"How's my cousin?" He asked, biting back at her.

"Which one?" She replied.

"The one you fuck on doctor's appointments. That one."

"So Hayley is to get back at me."

"I didn't fuck Hayley." He stated.

"Maybe you should have."

Before jumping in the shower, she made coffee and set breakfast out on the table for Tavin. Kelly obviously had other plans first thing in the morning. When she got upstairs, their door was closed and she heard them in bed together. She started her shower and made it quick. She had to get the day started and get Alex from Delaware. She wondered how she would even begin to handle this situation. Should she handle it at all? What was the point? Once out of the shower, she called her dad and woke him up.

"You have my monitor." She told him. "Is it on your table?"

"Yes." He said he'd leave the door unlocked, that she could stop by and get it. He was going back to sleep. She didn't remember leaving it there to begin with.

"I'm sorry about yesterday, dad. I was a little heated."

"As usual. Bye, Julia." He hung up on her.

Julia googled Care's address and found it would take 2 1/2 hours to get to Millsboro, Delaware from her house. Tatia only went to school for three hours. They wouldn't be back in time to get her, but if they left after Tatia was done school, they wouldn't be home in time for Jay to go to work by 3pm. "Well, Jay. What do you wanna do?" Julia asked. 

"Gimme the fucking keys. I'll go alone. How about that?"

"Fine, then. Go now. I'll walk Tia to school."

She fixed herself a bowl of cereal and then got Tatia ready for school. She walked her there and head to her dad's for her monitor. She checked her sugar and she gave herself insulin before walking home. As Julia rounded the corner to the house she saw a car in front of it. She saw the marine at the wheel of the car, his cell in his hand. Obviously preoccupied by the device, she moved out of his field of vision and she called Chess.

"What do they fucking want? Are they gonna kidnap me? I can keep going."

"Come home. Where is Jayson?"

The marine stepped out of the vehicle as she walked toward the house. She pulled her pack in front of her and reached into the front pocket. She carried that knife for a reason. As she nearly drew the weapon on this young dressed marine, she saw Chess appear on the sidewalk.

"Put it away, Julia." He warned her.

"You're here?" She asked.

"Don't see how I have a choice."

Chess escorted her to the house and stopped at the front door. The marine at the door opened the pack and he took her knife. As if that was the only one, she smirked. They were all over their house. He opened the bag and went through it and handed it back when he was satisfied. He said nothing. He waited outside the door as she and Chess head in. Chess and Jody were entertaining.

She looked at Mayers. "Go to the gym, Mayers." Chess ordered.

He looked at Julia, then to the marine outside the door.

"Jody, go. It's cool." She said, seeing Dr McGill with another dressed marine at his side. They sat on her sofa in her house, drinking coffee and waiting.

Once Jody left the house, the marine holding the door open for him, the dress marine looked at Julia. "Where is Jayson Keller?"

"On his way to Delaware to get his brother from his girlfriend's house. He kind of ran away yesterday."

"Mr Keller or his brother?"

"His brother. He's 14."

"When will he return?" 

"I'd guess around noon. He isn't staying there. He has work this afternoon." Julia glanced at the clock. He had left at 6 and it was 830. "You are?"

"That's not important. McGill, show Mrs. Morgan."

Julia dropped her bag on the counter and Chess had her sit at their small coffee table on a kitchen chair. He sat quiet as he hadn't been addressed by anyone yet. Dr McGill opened a folder in front of her. "I understand you have some reservations in regards to our physicians following your case. They are trained and specialize in any and all aspects of the virus that you carry." Dr McGill showed her a picture of a black woman in labor. He flipped to the next picture, that of this black woman's baby emerging through her vagina. He flipped the picture over moved onto the next. The infant crying. "Healthy newborn male." Dr McGill stated. "Two days later." He continued as the picture turned to the infant. Leads and tubes and wires hung off the child in an incubator.

"He was in California." Julia stated, touching the picture. "His name is Jose Montoya."

Dr McGill looked puzzled. His mouth open to speak and he glanced at the man adjacent to him.

"Twelve hours later." Dr McGill stated, turning the picture over to the next.

Julia gasped. "Oh, shit." She picked up the photo and sensed death. She set it back down and Dr McGill flipped to the next picture. A turned infant. Mottled dark skin and glazed eyes that stared at a camera. Its small mouth agape, wrapped in blankets, a hat on his head.

"2 hours post mortem." Dr McGill said under his breath. "Your birth needs to happen in our lab. No one should be present."

"I disagree." Julia said, holding the picture of the turned baby. "How many births have you seen?"

"12."

"How many turned?"

"11."

"I am not trying to be difficult. I told you what I want."

"We can make allowances for Mr Keller." Dr McGill's mystery marine spoke up. "There are clear rules and restrictions. Your appointments will be at a hospital in a doctor's office that is not affiliated. Your birth will be in the lab and he will be able to be present, but he will not be provided the location of this lab and neither will you. You will enter and exit unaware of it's location. There are ways." He said. "From what Dr McGill has told me, Mr Keller is immune."

"From what I understand, yes." Julia replied.

"He may have been discharged from the program in haste and he should never have been released from the lab after he destroyed our specimen."

"Your specimen-" Chess placed his hand on Julia's and shook his head.

"We seek his cooperation in addition to yours."

"If he is immune, then he should be able to withstand infection." Dr McGill said, closing his folder. "He should be able to live if directly infected with the virus, both strains and then-"

"You wish to have him volunteer to be infected and then you want to study him in depth."

"Yes."

"What if you're wrong?" Julia asked.

"What if he's not? Do you wish to find a cure, a vaccine, Mrs. Morgan?"

"Can I volunteer? I'll do it." She suggested.

"No. We have all we need from you. To be honest, if you were not with child, we would not be sitting here now with you."

"You'll need to ask him. I cannot answer for him."

"I believe he'll do so. He may need some coaxing. Mr Morgan feels as though you could help this along. You get what you want. We get what we want."

"Well, he's kind of mad at me right now."

"Make him un-mad at you then." He mocked her tone of voice. "We will wait for his arrival. We will discuss this and then we'll go from there."

"I-uh-have to get Tatia from school. She's in kindergarten."

"Make other arrangements."

Chess called Sandy and Julia listened as Chess got a million questions from his mother. He turned from a marine into a son in the matter of a minute flat. Sandy was difficult and wanted an explanation. Chess gave her one she would believe and she finally agreed to fetch Tatia from school. They waited what seemed an endless amount of time until Jay arrived home in Tavin's car. He'd taken Alex directly to school and left him go in late rather than come home, which was part of his punishment. School was a punishment for any 14 year old. Jay had talked with him, saved his ass from Julia's wrath a little while.

"What's going on here?" He asked as the same dress marine left him inside his own house.

Jay sat at the coffee table in Chess's chair next to Julia and he listened as they gave him the same speech they'd given her and Chess earlier. He sat pensive a moment as he processed this information. He noticed the IV was still inserted in Julia's wrist as he thought. "So what you're saying is I won't be able to be there when my kid's born unless I do this? That's basically what you're saying, right? And you're saying there's a possibility, a pretty big one, that she'll be born like this baby in California?"

"That sums it up, Jayson." Chess said, standing next to him.

"You want me to volunteer. And then go alone wherever this new lab is? When?"

"Now."

"And then 3 weeks of quarantine, right?"

"Give or take. Depends on how you react to the virus."

"I hope your new lab is safer than the last one." He said with a hint of sarcasm, standing up from his seat. He looked at Julia. "Well? I guess I'll see you in a few weeks." He dropped his cell phone on the table and waited.

"Very well then. I would say we will release him on your next doctor's appointment if all goes well." Dr McGill said.

Jay, the mystery marine and Dr McGill left the house, got into the car out front. The dress marine who was posted at the front door left as well. He left her knife on the step before he went and drove them off.

"Uh, did he just leave with them?"

"It looks like it and they left my ass here."

"Did he really just volunteer to be infected and leave with them? Chess, he's never been sick. What if-"

"Julia, it was his decision."

"I thought he'd say no, Chess."